Becoming Flemish

You know you're becoming Flemish when . . .

• You feel insulted when you're channel surfing and you run across "Walker, Texas Ranger" dubbed in French.
• You get frustrated with pedestrians when you ride your bike, and you become ticked off at the bikers when you are on foot.
• You recognize when a Frenchman is announcing the stops on the train and butchering the Flemish language in the process.
• You crave chocolate every minute of every day.
• You see Zwarte Piets in the streets and think to yourself, "My, how quaint," rather than "My, what a hideously politically-incorrect statement."
• You begin to notice with mild disdain whenever anyone is wearing a color of any kind (including yourself!)
• You never leave home without your umbrella.
• You can distinguish between dialects from Bruges, Antwerp, and Gent, and you recognize that whatever it is they speak in the Netherlands sounds NOTHING like the Dutch you know and love.

. . . and this is just the beginning . . .